A New Chapter

Where to even begin this update? For those of you who haven’t heard there are many huge changes right around the corner for me as I transition into a new season of life. 

First of all, I am getting married! I met a wonderful man through my time with the World Race and after dating long distance for a couple of years he proposed. I will be marrying him in Knoxville TN this coming June (aka next month, where has the time gone?!) and will make his home my home. Which means, I am saying goodbye to my life here in Florida and I will begin a brand new chapter.

Speaking of chapters, the major reason I am reaching out to you today is to update you on my book. Some time ago I announced a project that I felt the Lord had put on my heart and I wanted to finish it by December 2020. Along with that deadline came the realization of just how much more work I had to put in. I reached my goal in pages (230) and knew that it was incomplete. Seeking the Lord’s wisdom through prayer I felt that it was time for me to take a break from school and focus FULL TIME on finishing this project by the end of this year. 

That is why this summer I have decided to take a furlough from my graduate program at Grace University and dive in deep with this book. Since you are part of my trusted community and you have watched me pursue the Lord and what I felt Him calling me into from the very beginning, I wanted you to know how I would be spending my time over the next six months. The more writing I do the more clearly I see a story that God has purposed me to tell. I want to invite you to be praying for me and this project as I make it my priority. I wholeheartedly believe this book is Holy Spirit inspired and sustained and so I need prayer warriors supporting me as I try to push through the mundane work, lean on Him more and finish this project. 

To conclude, I am releasing one of my favorite chapters that I have written so far! This is the raw, unedited version of a character who is in the midst of a dark, internal struggle. I am describing the very present spiritual warfare that is happening behind the scenes that we don’t always see or understand, but is ALWAYS THERE. My hope is that by writing in such a way that is unique and fantasy driven, I will help to (1) expose what the enemy does to kill, steal and destroy and (2) inspire curiosity within people to seek the Lord and discover His character in a way they never have before.

I will warn you, although most of what I have written is lighthearted and hopeful, this is a particularly heavy chapter. I chose to share this one because it stands on its own well without context and gives you an idea of the spiritual depth I am reaching for and the fictional way in which I am writing. Although this particular chapter may seem to end on a gloomy note, remember that this is not how the story ends, and that is exciting to me. So without further delay here is a sneak peak at the work I am doing so you can see for yourself what this book is all about! I hope it gets you interested to meet all of the other characters and to finish the story that God has placed on my heart once it is complete.

So go ahead, get cozy, and please enjoy this chapter from The Chronicles of Emunah: The Key

 

Emmett closed the book and placed it on top of his comforter. He scanned the quiet room and all of his belongings again, as he had done for the thousandth time since he had returned home after the car accident. There was something so comforting about being back in his own room surrounded by everything he had collected over his life. Comforting and haunting at the same time. All of the things that surrounded him now were just that, things. Useless things he had no purpose for. His stupid play station he couldn’t get out of bed to play, his basketball he couldn’t shoot. He would never have any use for all of the clothes in his closet, or sharp looking tennis shoes the guys envied. The guys. He looked at the wall where photographs of him and his best friends were taped to a cork board. He looked over the faces of his basketball team and baseball team, his girlfriend, Jenni, before the accident. How could he ever step outside again? How could he face those guys? He was a freak. 

Somewhere deep inside of his heart he knew he should be grateful. He fully realized there had been a real chance he would have never come back to this place, never would have seen his things again. It was by some stroke of luck he was here at all, but despite knowing all of that, he despised that stroke. 

He looked down at the blanket that covered his legs. He could see the form of his right leg under the covers, and on the left side the form suddenly disappeared below his knee. He could barely stand to look at himself, even with the blankets covering him up. He began trying to move his right foot. He knew his good leg was thin and weak and he needed to keep exercising it to keep it strong. Every muscle in his upper body seemed to bulge and he groaned in aggravation as he tried to do his exercises. Everything felt so much harder now, even these simple movements. He let out a loud yell of frustration and sat back onto the bed. It was hopeless.

Just then he heard a gentle tap at his bedroom door. 

“What?” he snarled.

“It’s me” Hazel spoke softly from the other side of the door. “I have some lunch for you and it’s your favorite.”

“I don’t want any food Hazel, go away.” He hated how cruel he sounded to her, but he was consumed by anger and resentment and that seemed to be the part controlling his mouth.

The door suddenly opened anyway and Hazel came in with an expression on her face that said she was armed for battle. “You have to eat or you will never get better” she stated matter of factly. “Get better?” Emmett lashed back, “Hazel, no amount of food is going to grow back this leg. I won’t be getting any better.” 

Biting her lower lip she hesitated slightly unsure of what to say. Choosing rather to just change the subject she laid the tray carefully across his lap, responding with “it’s meatloaf. I remember a day when you could have eaten the whole loaf at one time.”

Emmett glared down at the food, “that was back when I was an athlete. Now I don’t use any energy laying around in this bed.”

She smiled meekly, “so eat, get stronger to go back out there and expend all the energy you want ok?”

He looked up at her, her eyes eager to please him and his harsh demeanor cracked just a little. “Ok” he finally relented. 

Looking pleased Hazel wandered around his room, “have you checked your Mygram lately? You have a ton of comments from people who are asking how you are and saying they miss you and to get well.”
“No” he replied, “it’s too overwhelming to see all of that at one time.”

Emmett did feel hungry and was shoveling in his meal as quickly as he could. Although he wasn’t exercising like before, his appetite was still there.

“That’s ok,” Hazel continued “mom has kept everyone in the loop with what has been going on and how you are recovering.”

“I’m sure she has” Emmett said dryly.

Hazel laughed. Their mom had only had a Mygram account for a few months and it had been a learning curve. Thinking about their mom trying to navigate the virtual world at first made her smile as she remembered, “she no longer posts live videos of the inside of her jacket so that is a huge improvement.”

Emmett smiled slightly as he listened to his sister. It was nice feeling a bit normal for a few minutes. Just talking with Hazel about random things was a welcome change from all the doom and gloom he had been feeling.

Hazel stopped beside his desk and picked up the photo frame Jenni had given to him last Christmas. Emmet saw that it was a picture of the two of them they had taken together after a basketball game that season. Her long brown hair fell in tight curls all around her and his face was flushed and sweaty after a hard game against their school’s rival. He was lost in thought about that night when Hazel’s voice finally came through.

“Um have you talked to Jenni at all?” she asked.

“No why?”

“She wants to see you. She has reached out to all of us to try and get a hold of you. Why don’t you write her back?”

“Hazel I don’t want to see her. And regardless of what she thinks she wants, I know she doesn’t want to see me either.”

“She loves you Emmett.”

It felt as though Hazel was pouring salt into his gaping heart. He didn’t want to think about basketball, he didn’t want to think about Jenni, he didn’t want to think about anything that had to do with his life before. 

He felt the now familiar feeling of pain boiling beneath the surface and he turned it quickly into red hot anger. Enjoying the rush of energy he wasn’t able to achieve physically anymore, he let it overcome him. 

Hazel was still talking, “I know you are feeling self-conscious about your leg, but she misses you and I know you miss her…”

The room began to spin as Emmett became blinded by his rage. He felt powerful for the first time since coming home. 

His eyes lit as if on fire and he screamed at her “you don’t know anything!” Throwing the tray across the room at her, she ducked out of the way as it crashed against the wall, food splattering against it. 

He felt a surge of adrenaline like he hadn’t felt in a long time and rode it like a wave, “you don’t know anything about Jenni, or about what I am feeling, or about anything at all! Get out,  get out, get out!”

Her eyes became wide with shock and then fear, Hazel ran out of the room leaving the door open behind her. He could hear her running to her room as she tried to stifle the sobs he had evoked by his extreme reaction.

Left in the now deafening silence, Emmett instantly regretted his actions.  How could he speak to his own sister that way? He recounted the way she had looked at him in terror, It was still him after all. Did she truly believe he would hurt her, that he even could hurt her in this state? But hadn’t he done just that? Holding his head in his hands he began to weep. She just wouldn’t stop talking about it, he told himself,  but even he couldn’t justify what he had done to her in his mind. He felt the hopelessness of ever being the same again weighed down on him like a brick wall. He would never get better. Never. It felt like his insides matched his outsides, disgusting and grotesque. 

He was nothing but a monster now…

 

Emmett’s explosive anger had worn him out so much that he had quickly fallen asleep soon after Hazel had left his room. As he slipped from a conscious state to a dream one, a shadow seemingly made up of pitch darkness moved from beneath his bed and through the bedroom wall to the outside world. The twisted shape floated like a cloud of smoke and ash as it followed the call its master was making for it. As if it had wings it flew unnoticed on the streets and around pedestrians. Other than the occasional dog barking in alarm, live ones rarely picked up on its oppressive presence. Of all the live ones, the humans seemed especially ignorant. This allowed it to move among them as naturally as the rain that drenched their clothes. Passing by a woman who was talking on the phone as she walked, the darkness couldn’t resist lingering around her, filling her air with the sickening stench of its very being. The woman instantly became agitated and began to yell on the phone, hurling insults and harsh words. The dark shape smiled with pride at the chaos it left in its wake and moved on, leaving the woman confused and embarrassed as to why she had suddenly become so angry. Continuing on to its master, the twisted shadow moved faster now, anxious to report all that had happened with target 86153ZC. It was drawn to the sound of its master and no matter where the call came from, the darkness could find the location from which it was sent automatically.

Several hundred miles away, the cloud rode the call like a ship sailing towards a beacon until it had reached the origin a few minutes later. Finding the skyscraper with which its master stood at the very top, the shadow of darkness landed at the opposite end of the building. The shadow stopped and waited to be called, half in reverence and half in fear of being beckoned by one so powerful. Shaking to its very core as it watched its master from behind, the dark shadow waiting intently for permission to approach. 

“Come here Thymos.” the voice spoke, silky and alluring. 

The shadow slowly closed the gap between it and its master. 

“How is our patient doing? The innocent words came out slathered in contempt, like a slow breeze tainted by a sickly poison.

Although a face could not be distinguished in the twisted cloud of darkness, the shadow of Thymos grinned in its own disturbing way, reveling in the misery it had just witnessed. It’s words came out in a sharp hiss, “excellent master. It would seem that target 86153ZC hates his new reality and is in the process of pushing everyone away from him.”

“That is good news” the tall figure replied. “He is right on track. Stay close to him, see to it that no one can stand being around him.”

“It would be my pleasure master. Would you like for me to gather some assistance for this job?”

The figure inhaled deeply, a faint hint of a smile appearing. Slowly exhaling, the shadow’s master replied, “no backup will be needed. Fuel his anger and he will do the rest of the work himself. Isolation is the key with this one Thymos. If we can separate him from his people for long enough, he will be begging me to relieve him in no time. Report back to me when he is drowning in his own despair, then I will make contact myself.”

The shadow of Thymos moved low as if to bow, “yes master.”

“Dismissed” the formidable figure wove a hand out towards the shadow, speaking with clear authority.

Thymos was quick to oblige, almost fleeing from the terrifying presence of its master. Taking its time to distress a few unsuspecting humans on the way back, the thick shadow eventually returned to its new domain next to the boy, making itself at home and resting in his misery.

To be continued….