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March 9th, 2019

Stepping across the border into China was like walking straight into enemy territory. We marched clothed in the heavy armor of our God past the guard towers, the fortified walls, and even the front lines. Into the midst of hand to hand combat we found ourselves. The spiritual atmosphere was heavy with the battle going on all around us, and we were hit with pieces of shrapnel manifested in the physical realm as sickness, emotional torment and struggling to hear clearly from the Lord became our reality.

Our second week in southwest China my friend Meghan was struck with appendicitis and we rushed her to the hospital. Within a few hours it was clear to us that the medical staff would fail us, and without divine intervention, we would be mourning a great loss. Thankfully Dad did intervene, and we left the hospital almost twelve hours after arriving (but that’s another story.)

During that long, restless night the Lord revealed something to me. This place in the city where people brought their loved ones for care and medical attention, was a place where fear, indifference and hopelessness had embedded itself. We overheard angry arguments, witnessed careless nurses and experienced firsthand patients being forgotten. As I waited up for the doctors to come, I saw many being treated with the same symptoms; hacking, nausea, coughing up phlegm and blood, fatigue. It makes sense, I thought to myself, why the staff doesn’t seem to care that Meghan is in so much pain…”it will pass” they said “it’s probably the food”, “this happens a lot.” This IS normal to them. 

In addition to Meghan, many people on our team experienced the same symptoms..the stomach aches, cramps, diarrhea, fever…as if our bodies were trying to reject something that was there. 

It was an earthly representation to me, of what was happening in the spiritual realm. The enemy rooting himself deep into these peoples’ lives. A sickly and twisted impersonation of the lives God intended for us to have. Lives full of joy, good health and singing His praises. Many of us could sense that satan didn’t want us there and his troops were rallying to extricate us in the same way our stomachs twisted and tightened to return the poison that we felt lingered there. 

The image of those patients overrunning the place so much there were not enough beds for them, is burned into my brain. They were lined up along the hallways, gasping for air, despair and fear in their eyes, and no one took notice. The medical staff insisted there is nothing to be concerned about, just give them fluids and wait for the symptoms to subside. 

My spirit ached to cry out to them, “this isn’t normal!” The oppression and heartache has become so repetitive, so ordinary, it is accepted as fact. It is accepted as truth. 

This is what happens when we accept what we feel, what we see, and what we are told above the greater Truth that is written on our hearts. When we accept the world as it is and live according to its’ ways and understanding we live a life of sickness and fear. Out in the hallway with a cheap imitation for a cure dripping one drop at a time into our veins, we wait for someone to tell us it will be ok. 

My friend Meghan cried out to the Lord that night, and He answered her, He healed her. We left that morning, confident in the knowledge of who our God is. 

But what of those other people being treated? The ones whose only reality was that of the hospital?

Due to the spiritual oppression and warfare going on in parts of China I have found it more difficult than ever to hear from the Lord. He soothes my fears and worries with His Word written for us long ago. Even when He feels far off and removed from me, I trust His promises and remember all that He is. 

And wow. Oh wow. Even if I haven’t felt God, ohh how I have seen Him in China. I have seen Him in a woman fiercely empowered by the Spirit to get up on a public train and share the Good News with strangers. There was no fear or hesitation, even when people became angry and moved, she would not yield to anyone. 

 

I have seen Him in young missionaries from the states, living their lives long term in a closed country. Making connections with people, pouring into students and being a part of the church. Banding together with other believers to encourage and build one another up, spreading His light like fire across the nation.

I saw Him in my non-believing friends taking good care of me and all of my needs, reflecting the hospitable and loving nature of Christ.

I saw verses on T-shirt’s in shopping malls and hear Christian songs over the speakers in restaurants. After praying with beggars on the street, I saw God in their downcast faces suddenly flooded with hope as they repeat after me with a joyous “AMEN!” I saw Him in my own teammates as they stay up all night in hard seats on trains teaching the Good News. I saw Him in unregistered churches singing His praises and interceding on the behalf of the entire nation. 

Closed country? Nothing is closed to the Name above all Names, Lord above all Lords, the Maker of heaven and Earth. He is moving and spreading throughout this country. He has not forgotten His beloved children, even when they can’t feel Him…He is there. THAT IS TRUTH.

When asked what I was doing in China, I would plainly say “I’m here on my Fathers business”, and when asked what He does I would simply smile, my eyes sparkling with His love for them… “I’m so glad you asked.” 

The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell. Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident. One thing have I desired of the Lord, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to seek him in his temple. (Psalm 27:1-4) 

14 responses to “I Won’t Accept Your Normal”

  1. Emily,
    I really love reading your blogs! Thank you for posting and allowing me to see what goes on around this world since I see only a small piece of it! The great thing is, I am always encouraged by your connections and the scriptures you include. Thank you!
    Tammy

  2. Reading this blog made me think that this could very well happen in America. The enemy is here too and working hard because his time is short. I am consoled daily by the Christians here in this small town where we live. People care here. And God’s people are everywhere, even in China and Mongolia… that is consoling as well. Yes, he is always with us – even when we are in a “worldly” environment..people who don’t care..He is there. Thank you for your testimonies to this fact.

  3. Em,

    I love this. So much trial and hardship. I can imagine, but it’s hard to fathom at the same time. I know these times must come with such surrender, and know that I am proud of you and still praying for you on the other side of the world. Keep being faithful, dear. It is inspiring to all. XOXO!

  4. I read this with great interest, Emily. Thank you for sharing what was going on in your heart and thoughts in China. Christ is there.

  5. Wow thank you so much for reading! This encourages me to continue sharing what God lays on my heart.

  6. Wow thank you so much for reading! This encourages me to continue sharing what God lays on my heart.

  7. You are so right! God continues to give me a burden for the states. How much we have and yet how little we trust the Lord and know what it means to be in relationship with Him. Thankful for all of the people working in the states to introduce Jesus to the lost and broken hearted!

  8. Surrender is our word for this month! How deep your words resonate, thank you dear friend. For everything. There are no words for the love I feel for you.

  9. Awww thanks Suz!!! It was quite the experience and it changed my perspective and understanding even more being in China. Priveleged to be apart of it!

  10. WOW…just wow!! God is alive and at work! Psalm 121:3-4; Chronicles 28:20
    Love you so much, Mom